PMS and dieting don't mix...

I fell off the wagon.

(Sigh.)

I ate some chocolate although I know I shouldn't have. When my body is preparing for a visit from Aunt Flo not only do I want to karate chop my husband for no particular reason, I crave sweets like a MAD WOMAN. And, going into this new lifestyle change, I hadn't given prior thought to how I would counter my hormonal surge; so, I caved and devoured some chocolate sweets from the office candy shop (yep, my job has it's own candy shop).

But, I am not going to wallow in my shame. I am dusting myself off and getting back on the saddle. I am determined to succeed at this journey although there may be bumps along the way.

Back in the day, if I would have fallen, I would have just stayed down and camped out in my pity. But, not anymore. It is unrealistic to think that I won't mess up sometimes. That is exactly why we need a Savior (Jesus) because alone we cannot succeed at anything. We need His power to give us what we need. 

So, here's to a new start. And the next time Aunt Flo wants to invite me to have chocolates at her place, I'm gonna tell her where to go.

Celery sticks, here I come.

Where'd all this fat come from?

Being skinny starts in the head first, so this week I am working on getting my mind right as I transition into this new lifestyle. One of the things I am doing is asking myself, "Where'd all this fat come from?"

I have gained TEN POUNDS over the last three months and I need to find out how in the world did that happen. Being the sleuth that I am, I investigated the matter and came up with a pretty compelling case that some self-sabotage has been going on:

Exhibit A: Each weekday, I get off work at 5 p.m., then hurry to get my kids from daycare (at two different locations on two different parts of town). By the time I get home, it's around 6:30 p.m. or later. I try to cook something quick, fast and in a hurry. Usually, we don't eat until 7:00 p.m. or later and it's traditionally fatty or fried.

The verdict: Eating late is never good for the waistline, especially when I am in a coma less than two hours later.

Exhibit B: Dunkin Donuts recently opened a location within walking distance of my job. Although I am a Krispy Kreme kind of gal, once I tasted DD's sour cream doughnut I was hooked. I have eaten one too many of those.

The verdict: Sugary, sour cream-filled, fried doughnuts make the daily caloric intake shoot through the roof.

Exhibit C: I use to get up and run in the mornings -- at least three times a week. I loved breathing in the fresh air and having quiet time just for me. But, mounting work projects began to stretch into wee hours of the night and I eventually retired my running shoes.

The verdict: Late night eating PLUS an abundance of Dunkin Donuts TIMES no exercise EQUALS a big 'ole butt.

Yep, looking at the evidence, I am guilty as charged of sabotaging my diet and adding needless pounds to my body. I hereby sentence myself to prepare healthy, easy-to-reheat dinners on the weekend so that I can serve them during the weeknights and eat no later than 6:30 p.m. I sentence myself to one sour cream doughnut per month (and only if I am totally feigning. Otherwise, I don't need it.) Lastly, I sentence myself to dust off those running shoes and get moving no matter what. 

If I am going to be a skinny girl, I have to be proactive. I can't think like an overweight person and expect the pounds to fall off. That ain't gonna happen.

Philippians 4:8-9
Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. What you have learned and received and heard and seen in me—practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.

Temptation...ALREADY

I planned to start my journey towards high-school skinny slowly -- giving up sweets this week, starting today.

Well, it's 3:30 p.m., I'm at work and this is usually the time of day when I reach for something sweet to give me that boost so I can make it to 5 p.m. I was digging in my briefcase for something and that's when I noticed that I forgot to throw out my beloved GUMMY WORMS. You know, the fruit-flavored wigglies that are lightly dusted with some sweet and sour yummyness.

I am feigning for them. I tell myself, "Well, technically they are not sweet; they're sour."

Lord, give me the strength. (breathe)

Isn't that how it always goes...you try to do good, but then the inner temptress rears her ugly head.

Quick, read Romans 7:18-20, 24-25 
For I know that nothing good dwells in me, that is, in my flesh. For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out. For I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want, it is no longer I who do it, but sin that dwells within me.

Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death? Thanks be to God through Jesus Christ our Lord! So then, I myself serve the law of God with my mind, but with my flesh I serve the law of sin.

I know that this journey is going to take God helping me. My flesh wants to eat any and everything I desire, but that's not good for me. This journey is one I have to take hand-in-hand with Jesus. If not, I am toast.

Feeling a little better now. I'm about to throw the gummies in the trash...

Whew!!! I am saying no to these gummies because my hips have been gummy long enough.

Take that, temptation.

Attack of the killer butt

You know you’ve gained too much weight when you can no longer pull your pantyhose all the way over your behind. They… (tugging) ... only … (pulling) ... go up … half-way … (panting for breath).

Alas...

That’s me. I stepped on the scale this morning and the number staring back at me was the same one I saw when I was SIX MONTHS PREGNANT.

That’s it. I’ve had enough. I am sick of running past the mirror so I won’t get a glimpse of my reflection. I want to be me, again – fearfully and wonderfully made (and fine as wine).

The problem is, though, I love food. I am from the South and if you cut me, I will bleed hot, buttered grits. It's true, I do eat when I’m stressed and what not, but mainly I eat because I love food. Period.

I’ve tried all the diets out there. Heck, I could write my own diet book. I know all the tips intellectually, but for some reason they haven’t sunk down inside my heart and mind.

Today, though, I am starting my journey towards being high-school skinny. I am too young, 37, and have too many things I want to do to be slowed down by weight.

All kinds of problems come along with weight issues like high blood pressure, disease and premature death. I think it’s a sin to go to an early grave just because you don’t have self control.

For example, for the longest I thought I was losing my mind because I would constantly hear a whishing noise when I walked and felt an eerie presence behind me. Well, as it turns out, it was my big ‘ole butt the whole time. That sound is my thighs rubbing together (when I wear pantyhose it’s probably a fire hazard) and that “presence” is the mound of round flesh attached to my back. I look like I am pregnant with twins FROM BEHIND!!!

I plan to get through this journey with faith (in Christ) and lots of laughter. So follow along with me so that together we can learn to be high-school skinny, again.